Parenting Tips for the New School Year

When we think of bullies, most of us tend to think of children being the victim; however, adults can be bullied too. Adult bullies target victims in ways similar to how children bully. First of all regardless of the age,   bullies take advantage of an individual that the bully perceive as a threat or dislike someone because of differences. Secondly they tend to go   after someone whose interpersonal style avoids confrontation. A bully’s intention is to go after someone that can be made to feel afraid or angry through verbal abuse by name calling, teasing, threats, etc. This is a learned behavior. As a child, the adult bully was perhaps not taught how to communicate his or her needs in a healthy manner. Additionally, the child may have observed this or his or her parents display bullying behavior towards others. It is no surprise that adults who bully were probably bullied as a child

Here are a few tips if you are being bullied:

• Consider if the relationship you have is making you feel uncomfortable, do you try to avoid encounters or interactions?

•  Is this someone you work with or a family member?

•  Try not to take a bully’s behavior personally

•  Try not to get angry

•  You may want to consider taking a course of action such as removing yourself from the situation – if possible

•  Be aware of your body language and speak in a clam voice

•   If you decide to confront the individual, then use” I statements” at beginning of your sentence.

If none of these tips work, you may want to seek professional

 assistance.

          --Monica Hayden, LISW-S